I think I'd name this post "Random stuff about me"

Oh goodness, this blog has been abandoned for so long! Been busy with work. Or I may just be too lazy to even write a line.

Anyway, I've been monitoring my life from the outside of my own skin. It wrecks, of course, as I'm writing at 2am on a Monday morning in the office - but let's not go into that. Let's talk about being - what else - single in your 30s.

Seriously tho, I'm not a picky person. At least I don't use to be when I was younger. As I see a lot more of human behaviors, I became one. And at this age, frankly I don't really care. I may not be financially stable. I may not have enough money to support my own self, let alone Mummy & Makton, but hey - I'm sure everything will turn out fine, InsyaAllah.

So at this age, with half of the male species are married with children and the other half is gay.. chances are I"m gonna stuck alone forever. But please don't get emotional over this & try to put some motivational words to me - as I said to Pizli - motivation can suck itself.

From what I see now, I could get married & start a family, but it would be out of convenience. I mean, like in movies where they marry based on a contract? Yeah. Like that. With benefits to both parties & the agreed-upon prenups. Just an example - maybe if we constantly travel together, having parents in the same hometown, about to be homeless & trying to find a decent house to live in...

I don't mind that. Why would I? It would save me some money. And assuming the guy's not gay, I could finally get some. I'm sure you get what I mean.

I do NOT want somebody who:
1. Is selfish.
2. Does not respect the elders, especially my Mummy & Makton.
3. Wears a t-shirt with the collar up.
4. Likes to wear matching outfits.
5. Spits in public.
6. Goes overboard (in fashion, esp) to impress god-knows-who *rolles eyes*.
7. Too much into politics.
8. Talks about politics too loud with strangers beside him in a flight & thinks that he's opinions are the best.
9. Does not know how to drive.
10. Is a vegetarian.
11. Is a womanizer (but believe me if he is, he wouldn't even glance my way).
12. Is prettier than I am & wants to get "perfect" physically.
13. Has anger issues.
14. Is not a believer of any religion.
15. Can't do anything & makes me do everything.
16. Keeps secrets from me.
17. Ask for money on the 1st date.
18. Constantly broke.
19. Give bad comments on everything I pick - food, clothes, etc. And of course, thinks that his opinions are the best.
20. Wear white pants.
21. Drives a car with a huge & very loud boombox.
22. Drives a pink-colored car. Or yellow. Or any other striking colors that has been pimped.
23. Unhygienic.
24. Talks a lot. A WHOLE LOT.

I don't think that's all there is - it'll build up along the way.

So looking at things, it seems like I'm not gonna get it, yeah? I guess not.

Also, I watched a TV drama recently - Scandal. Olivia Pope told his ex-husband / fiance that maybe she likes fire & pain in her relationship. Not the exact words la, but you get the picture. Well maybe, just maybe, I am somewhat like her. Maybe I don't like the conventional relationship. Maybe I like what I can't have - explanation to why married men appear to be blueberry cheesecake before my eyes.

Note that I say blueberry cheesecake, and not chocolate cake? Because that's a reserved cake for my current married-man-crush-who-is-also-may-going-to-be-my-future-boss. Haha.

Oh and plus, all my life, I've never expressed my true feelings to any men. I just look from afar, became their good friend who listens & eventually everybody goes off with somebody else.

Ah. That's all for now. Problem with server, Maybank IT guy can't fix it, have to wait til tomorrow, yadda yadda... and I'm off for sahur at home. With my beloved emptiness.

Toodles!