Of being a nobody

I wasn't involved at the initial stage, I wasn't even in the CC. I'm just the dummy they're using to get the job done.

But in the software punya support site, I'm the contact person for this. So when they call me and asked things about initial discussions, suggestions and what-nots.. I was clueless.

And when I talk to the-person-i-loathe-for-the-rest-of-my-life, dia mmg tak pernah nak ikut cakap aku. I told him the other party wants to know this and that, dia taknak. And then bila nak suruh aku buat apa2, ayat semua arahan yg buat aku sakit hati. Macam aku ni sampah.

"work on the URL/component to booking thing and also there's a support case on VA toolbar". Takde please, takde thank you. Lepastu dia kuar makan. Tak ajak aku langsung.

GILE SAKIT HATI.

Padahal case VA toolbar tu dia punya. Aku cakap dgn dia, last time aku nak tengok dia kata takyah, dia handle. Pastu skang soh aku plak. Dia cakap dia tak geti handle sbb support nak suruh hantar itu ini macam2 la. Aku tanya pesal tak cakap dgn aku, dia cakap too busy masa tu time nak roll-out.

Ye, semua kesalahan point balik kat aku.

Initially I didn't want to get involved with this project. Aku nak resign, but he kept giving me motivation plus he was being the nicest creature on earth kan.. So I stayed and buat this project for him. I stayed late, worked overtime.. all because of him.

Seriously, apa aku buat for this project.. semua for him. And not for the company, bcoz I know how my company is.

But I guess I was wrong. And now, aku sangat sakit hati. Walaupun skang kire baik jugak la dengan dia semula.. but I was so damn wrong about him.

I feel I want to resign this very instant. I'm SOOOOO DUMB!!! Can you just smack me in the face?! Oh no need. Reality checked in. I'm miserable now. Consider me being smacked in the face. Hard.